Jul 23, 2009


This picture, in giant form, hangs above the fireplace in our home. I walk by it, on average, 25 times a day, but rarely do I read it. I see it, admire it, comment to myself how cool it is. But rarely do I really think about what it says. I originally bought it to go in Marks office, and it was there for a while, but when I needed to convert his office into a kids space, the picture came into the living room.
And so this morning, I walked by it twice and the third time stopped to really look. While I was there, I had a little conversation with God that went something like this:

Me: No such thing as small change thats for sure. What do you think my capacity is?
Him: I know the plans I have for you...
Me: Ya, but I'm not as strong as you think. I'm barely holding up under the weight.
Him: My yoke is easy and my burden is light. Learn from me.
Me: I am not wise enough, strong enough or brave enough.
Him: Thats exactly what I want.
Me: How could I be what you want?
Him: In your weakness, my strength is made perfect
Me: But there are so many things that I don't understand!
Him: Bring them to me!
Me: Why can't I have a baby? Why me!? Why do I have to be barren?
Him: So that the work of God may be displayed in your life. Think of Sarah, Rachel, Hannah, Elizabeth...
Me: You've chosen the wrong girl!
Him: I never choose the wrong girl!
Me: Ya, but...
Him: I KNOW THE PLANS I HAVE FOR YOU...

This is often the conversation I have with God. I am always calling Him on His Word, challenging Him, questioning Him, which just reveals my insecurity. I am worried that I'll be passed over, forgotten, I'll get old and I'll be barren still. And then I hear those scriptures over and over...'and the Lord opened her womb....and Sarah laughed....he settles the barren woman as a happy mother of children....' He knows the plans, which means I don't. Thats what faith is. Trusting in what you can't see! I And so, when I see 'There is no such thing as small change, I'm reminded again and again, that there is SO MUCH MORE that he has in store for me. And the road is not easy, but He knows the plans...

1 comment:

Patty said...

Isn't it amazing that we have this kind of a God? One who speaks to us and reminds us that He loves us so much more than we can imagine.