Today, I buried my face in the carpet and cried my eyes out. I cried out of loss, desperation, gratitude, and worship. I spent a long time like that. Just crying. I formed very few words and yet God saw all the things that were in my heart.
"But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.
In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will."- Romans 8:25-57
I knew I needed Him. I needed His heart. When I function on my own, I am bitter, broken & a huge mess. When I get a hold of Him, everything changes. I lean on His strength & it carries me.
"Passing through the Valley of Weeping, they make it a place of springs; the early rain also fills the pools with blessings. They go from strength to strength [increasing in victorious power]; until each of them appears before God in Zion" - Psalms 84:6
These are on repeat lately in my house:
He is infinitely greater than we can ever imagine. His love for us is beyond any on this earth. And that love is something I want to know for my whole life!
3 comments:
Hey. I thought of you a lot at my conference. One of the things that John Townsend talked about was grieving. Grieving not just lost ones, but lost dreams, lost friendships, lost plans for ourselves and goals. This is something that I have always struggled with. It was ground breaking for me. I am giving myself permission now to grieve. It is incredibly hard, but so rewarding. I love you and am praying for you in this time. You are an amazing strength. I love reading your blog :)
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Oh, dear. I know this is several days late, but you're in my prayers. He's a good God, and He's for you.
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